Going to aus....Not going to aus???

Yo.... i'm back, dear. It seems to be ages ago since my last blog. Many things have happened during that time. "People come, people go" ----don't ask my why i say this!!

I have experienced different feelings and learned alot of lessons for the past few weeks. Amazed to find outt hat i'm not as optimistic, cheerful and motivated as i thought. In fact, i'm lacking of self-confidence, alot. I feel so discouraged in performance and singing. Sometime, i dun even dare to take the first step when i perform or sing. "I'm not going to make it". i know it's very unhealthy to have this kind of thinking but just can't help it. Thanks to Aik teong for supporting me. I will try my best to overcome it.

On the other hand, i just found outt oday that i may be able to study in aus next year, Feb intake in Murdoch Uni. I should be glad abt it. But unfortunately, i dun feel as i ahve expected. On the contrary, i'm afraid that i can't adapt to the life there and i will definitely miss my fren, my theater, my singing lessons here. Never have such feeling b4, not even when i left for Sg last time. Anyway, i still need to double confirm with da uni (some problem witht he credit transfer matter) and check out with my dad regarding his 'financial status' first. Of course, if suddenly a local uni or col pops out with 'Media Studies' this course, i will be the first oen to enroll and stay back in malaysia.!!!

..............

Some words are hard to be uttered out.
They hurt.
But when one keeps giving out
and one keeps receveing
The steelyard is not balancing at all.
Sorry.

Dreams will come true

I WANT TO BE A GOOD LEADER.
I WANT TO REACH MY AMIBITION.
I SHALL NOT BE SO FORGETFUL.
I SHALL DO MORE EXERCISES.

Sadness can be infected

I visited my fren's blog just now. ................................................................................

dunno how to describe how sad am i! he spoke of how anti-social he was and how ppl talked to him. after reading it, my mind blank. It sounded abit like me.!!!! and now, his sadness infected me liao. His frens posted him alot msg, sending regards to him. i did too.

To make me feel more miserable, i tot of the incident occurred few days ago. I hurted my fren unconsciously, not until she told me. i didn't mean to do it, i just took the wrong action and uttered the wrong words automatically. I"m blue blue blue blue... deadly..........blue.............

我的心情故事

关于我们之间的事

会微笑的秀发 在我手中睡著
这瞬间像永恒 在梦幻的边缘
也许有一天 我们不在相恋
但希望这感觉 停留在心里面
关于爱你 我现在爱你
关于爱情 我用心很多
关于未来 结果会如何 我无法承诺
关于自己 我已经足够
关于彼此 我还在学习
关于未来 我没有答案 我无法承诺

词/曲/唱: 张震岳


关于未来, 我真的看不清前方, 把手伸出去, 捉拿不到任何东西, 迷雾让我感觉一片冰冷. 停在原地踌躇, 不是因为懒散, 而是没目标的行走, 只会让我更迷失方向.

Me, piao liang?

Guess wat? My beauty has finally got the recognition of people.

When i was taking a rest in the theater lesson, Tian You (our advisor) asked me to go to his side. Bending down, i look at him seriously as i tot he would talk abt the performance stuff. And wat happened? he just utter out this sentence and halted me in the mid air.

"Shao Xuan, you are pretty today" (sth like that lar)

Common sense told me that he must be playing a fool on me. But he ensured me again. Well, perhaps i was just abit sensitive with this kind of compliment. i answered back that he must be kidding.

Anyway, heheehh glad to hear it!

Gavin!! Gavin!! Gavin!!

GAVIN YAP!!!!!!

I have been hearing his big name ( alot of gals will scream when they hear his name) for ages liao .but never ever got the chance to have a clear view of him. Not until today! GAVIN!!!1 You are sosssssssssssssssssssssssssssoooooooooooooooooo good-looking!!!!!! I'm going to jump into that bunch of gals' bandwagon, and together we scream for him!

Went to watch 'Wish I was There' , have high expectation on this theater, and no doubt, it was indeed a pretty good, well-organized, exquisited show. But, wat really surprised me were the lengchai actor (of course, Gavin, not Patrick Teoh lar.....) and the beautiful supporting actress (Carmen Soo....she did look like walking out from one of those fashion mag)

The clean-cut look, articulate pronounciation, charming smile, talking eyes, playful yet serious face, thin and tall but yet sturdy figure, and most importantly his talent (acting and writing script), would make all the gals run into him purposely if they spot him in any public places. Well, i think my bf is going to kill me if i go on complimenting a almost-perfect-guy here. So, i shall stop here and let u guys to imgaine.......

Not to boost, i have a fren who really looks like Gavin. When Gavin performed on the stage, he looked as if my fren!

We are very BAD!

Went for a theater meeting just now....... in KFC, situated in KL central (wat a weird meeting place). so coincidencely , we met si siang in the LRT (hahaha. in fact, we stay quite close to each other). Then, there he came, gave me a bad news, telling me that i wrote the venue as 'Central Market'... Gosh man! nah lar.. i wrote 'KL CENTRAL'.. then, we have some time arguing over it. I was confused myself too, doubting if i have really wrote the wrong things.

So, we have meeting in KFC. i guess we were the nosiest group there! sorry yeah! cuz i just can't help my self from speaking loud...hahahahaha! Terry was the funniest. He dropped down his script, which none of us did (LAZY!) then, Jasmine read it aloud and guess wat happened? Hahahahaha.. the memory is still very fresh in mind now.. cna't help it! hahahah. There were plenty of words tha Terry mispelled it. that amde sentences and words turned out to be a very different meaning! Poor tErry, we were over-amused over it. Si siang kept slapping the table, Auyong laughed like mad. I could say that we were in the theater, we would laught until rollling on the ground. There was once, Terry meant the 'night', but he replaced it with the 'bowl' cuz he didn't know how to write it. All of a sudden, a should-be-horror- ghost story turned into a comedy. I'm so sorry Terry. i know it's very wrong to laught at ppl's work. but i really can't tahan. When i asked them to stop the teasing laugh, i myself commit the mistake too.

However, we still managed to come out with some result lar... at least we have the main theme and a basic plot. And i called Terry too, to express my apologize.. i bet he might be talking sth bad behind me now... ahhaha.. nah-lar. and Si Siang!!! i wrote 'KL CENTRAL', not 'Central Market'.

Booga...booga

Booga...booga...booga! Yeah, TOEFL has over!

Can u imagine how relieved am i now? This afternoon, i was almost late to the venue as i was caught in the KL typical griplock. The moment i stepped into the testing center, i could feel both my palms were sweating. I was so afraid that i might loss plenty of points in the listening section cuz can't get used to the US accent.

However, wewh!!! managed to get thru it and score 25 over 30 for it. a great improvement. i got 18 when i first done this practice. Then, came the reading section. Walau yeh! why izit so hard..? answers looked the same to me.. In the end, got 203 over 300... ^_* ahahah slightly better than the previous one. think can ngam ngam reach the uni admission requirement gua.

I went back howm alone today. First, walked, monorail, walk again, LRT. It took me sometime to reach home. but who care? i have the time to enjoy it. Sometimes, kinda like to travel alone, abit like what i have done in SG!

TOEFL Disease

Argh~~~~~~~!!!! i'm going to sit for TOEFL tomorrow. Just sat for the trail this very morninng. Result? Damn it. i scored 200 over 300!!! How am i going to get a place in my dream university? Frankly speaking, i need some intense competition in order for me to work hard. This explains why i have been so slacked in the TOEFL preparation....seldom listen to CNN news, read eng newspaper, practice TOEFL exercises and blah blah blah. I pay no hope in it anymore. Worse comes to worse, pay another sum of money to sit for it again!

Rotten Orange here

Hihi, come here foe testing.. >.< testing 1,2,3...